October 8, 2009

On Life and Dreams

I am not like any other girls who dreamt about their weddings and prince charmings. When I was younger, I only have simple dreams.. traveling with a guy I really, really like.. cocktails, beach, romance and fun. Wedding bells, wedding gowns and an extravagant reception have never crossed my mind. Am I normal? Yes I am. At this age and time, I am starting to believe the laws of attraction.

My present is the future I have been dreaming about in the past. It may not be the closest to what I was and still dreaming.. no car yet, no fancy stuff and not alot of experiences to share. Though I want to think I am still young, I know I am a lil too old to still be single - exactly what I had in mind when I was still 7 years old. Funny how at some point, I dreamt about living a the sex, drugs and rock & roll life.. and do I really need to justify this?

Now, my mind is toying about the idea of being a mistress. Haha. I know I sound ridiculous! Maybe because I never wanted to be on the losing end.. instead of worrying about having my lover fall for another woman, why not be that woman then? I may receive alot of hate mails and rants for this post, but aren't some people thinking the same?

I wish I could do whatever I wish and wanted, but I am bound with values. Maybe in my own lil world, I can live the life I wanted and just totally be myself, but there are factors that are keeping me from doing whatever it is that I wanted. Like, the people I love.